A new computer virus called KaBlueE is spreading havoc around the internet by re-installing IE6 on infected machines. The timing of this pandemic is especially devastating in light of the fact that IE6 usage has finally dropped below 1%.

To add insult to injury, in addition to re-installing IE6, the virus also sets the home page to my.yahoo.com. As one industry insider pointed out:

“Just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse, it did. Sure, a lot of us were using My Yahoo as our homepage back in the early 2000’s, but I haven’t even seen a Yahoo page in at least 3 years. What a sick joke this is.”

Internet Community in Disarray

With the Internet abuzz, reactions to KaBlueE are nothing short of overwhelming:

Perhaps a quote from a top security expert (who asked to remain anonymous) best sums up the prevailing sentiment:

“Creators of KaBlueE are obviously deranged. I mean, I understand creating a virus to steal banking passwords or to turn computers into zombie bots. I don’t condone it, but I understand it. But this? What kind of sick bastard would get off on re-installing IE6? It’s unconscionable.”

End Users Impacted As Well

With more and more end users being infected, horrifying stories of horror are pouring in. Mary Lou Hemming, a retired accountant from suburban Atlanta, was one of the victims of KaBlueE. She described her harrowing ordeal to a local reporter:

“You know, my internet is kinda slow and my bank’s website looks sorta funny, but I really don’t understand why all these reporters are at my house. Did we win something?”

Jake Millen, a contractor from Portland, described his terrible experience after being hit by KaBlueE:

“I logged onto Facebook and it looked all messed up, but I just assumed it was another redesign.”

Final Thought

Many security experts consider KaBlueE to be extremely dangerous. John Mitchell, a leading expert on computer viruses, explains:

“It’s hard to underestimate the impact of this terrible virus. It could literally set us back a decade and make Melissa, Code Red, and Nimda look like child’s play. If we don’t get a hold of this infection soon, may God have mercy on us all.”

 

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This post got 11 comments so far. Care to add yours?

  1. Serge says:

    Thank you for making us laugh :))

  2. Delce says:

    This virus is horrible! It takes us right back to the stone age! I cannot believe there are people out there who want to impose this outdated and inefficient technology on users again. 🙁

    Anyway, the question is now, how do I get rid of IE6 and get my Netscape back?

  3. Broojo says:

    Fantastic article, made me lough out loud a few times 😀 “What kind of sick bastard would get off on re-installing IE6?”

    Makes me want to install it on my machine just to see how crap webpages actually render.

  4. One of the best satirical posts I’ve read in a while. Good job!